Text

she sits at
the edge of the
uncomfortable
plastic chair
false animation
in her limbs
she thought she'd
be ok
drawing red marks
on her arm with
a pen
the ink bleeding
into her skin

the nurses eye
her with contempt
dressed in two
billowing medical
nightgowns
hair pulled back
from her unlovely
face

tracing her scars
with her tongue
tasting the
skin there
mouth smiling
blood in her
teeth

a quick glance
to the nurses
station
peel back the
white cotton
covering the cuts
dried brown

taste of copper
on her tongue
savor it

the nurse frowns
and her mouth moves
silently
it doesn't matter

slipping into another's
room the
bathroom is
unlocked (not hers)
watching herself in
the mirror
her legs like two
straight sticks
that shine in
the sickly
light

'patient 2340'
they call her
she locks the door
and turns on the
shower
it drowns the sound
of the terrible
blankness in her
mind
it feels like
death creeping into
her
feels the pills
stored in her shoes
slippery under
feet that are
lotioned every
night and morning

there is a box in her
mind
it is a glowing black
and it grins
at her
with its blank
eyes
she has the keys
in her hands and
she puts them in
the lock which
promptly
bites down on her
fingers and
leaves them dripping
red blood

it is her pandora's
box
she is like pandora
in the myth's
only she is not
sure if she
will bleed acid
tears

there is knocking
on the door
soft at first
then louder
they are calling
her
they find her standing
in the shower
clothed and
shivering
her mind gone
away into that box
where she hides
her secrets

she comes
back to herself
when the needles
bites into her
arm
like a wasp
their dead eyes
looking at her
mouths moving
words slipping
onto the floor
words
the mating of
lips and tongue

they leave her
spread eagled
on the floor
waiting for the touch
of the blade
between
her legs
they are the
silent gestapo
the door is closed
forever and
ever amen