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when i go into
the cold stone
tombs of egypt
i want a sarcophagus
with a white face
wide staring eyes
rimmed with black kohl
i do not want a
plain black box
blind as a bat
resting inside
that tomb of soft
cotton the air
heavy with the
smell of death

when i leave
this earth it will
be with my wrists
split open
exposed to the world
as the tragic
ophelia living
in suburbia
nonsense
romanticized angst

i want to have
white lilies surrounding
my grave their
secret pale scent
threading through
the leaves of the willow

the blood drips off
pale white fingers
with a white band
where a ring used to be
the cat pauses
lounges before
my hunched slumped
figure and licks
the blood off my pale
white face

chalk face the poison
seeping out from
underneath rotten
inside the disease
spreading like a
fungus unfurling
its black limbs
testing the darkness
in my eyes

they don't come
and see until the rich
dead smell seeps
through the crack underneath
the door and out into
the halls
they cover their
noses and wonder
what that pale girl
in room 205 is doing
has something gone
rotten?

rotten indeed
doctor, i think we
have a problem
she has done gone
killed herself, she has
that poor little
girl masquerading
as a woman

lacerated face
eyes half open
glittering from
beneath dark
lashes
cheeks indented
inward the blood
on her lips
i tried to drink
of myself way too late
the damage was done
the fight was lost
tattered leaves
coming in through
the window
a dead drift of
them on the floor

cds burnt the bedding
torn apart
floor littered with
dozens of razor blades
poor pathetic existence
laid out in a
few strokes
sweet rotten smell
coming from the
bathroom
secrets tumbling from
the walls
whispered screams
gathered in the
corners

my shoes lie dead
on the floor
tongue unfurling
blank eyes staring

i want a sarcophagus
with a blank face
and terrible eyes
that keep watch

they will whisper
amongst themselves
wondering at the lack
of space left behind
was ever i important
leaving behind a room
full of papers written thick
with curling words
and pictures of models
with their eyes burnt out

i want a sarcophagus