Text

'here i am'
she trilled
twisting the
silver bracelets
on her outstretched
arms
inside her
sleeves the blood
slipped and chuckled
nestling into the
dark fabric
(washed with downy,
the greenish cap
covered with grime)

'here i am'
the words were
loud and yellow
in the still and grey
air
her lips were dry
and cracked
the food cruising
down in the drains
semi-digested and
rank
(like her mind)
the bile scratching
at the back of her
throat like a faithful
dog which wants
to be fed a treat
inside her clenched
fists silver razors
with grinning mouths
chortle and spit up
crimson blood
and pale flesh

'here i am'
words clinging to
the inside of her
mouth
neighbors with
the remains of her
dinner
breakfast was three
days ago
only a snort of cocaine
and a half rotten apple
when she wipes her
nose white powder
comes away (and
then blood, fucking
nosebleeds)
she grins with her
mouth (eyes like those
of a rabid animal cornered,
disease crawling and jittering)

'here i am'
fingers seeking
crawling down into
the drain (where dead hair
lies in its watery grave)
rotted food stinking
slinking down into
the slimy depths
where white mold
grows
rust that looks like
crimson ink
encrusted underneath
her fingernails
eyes lit up with
dull excitement
sober as a judge
(or not)

'here i am'
mouth twitching
this is here home
in the closet with
her breath sour
with the smell
of pills
(smooth and red
and soothing)
the floor covered
with grime and
greased over
blood
plastic bags full of
decayed vomit
at her back
moldering blanket
covering her
legs (thin and straight
as sticks)

(let her make her
grave and lie in it)

or is that closet?

'here i am'
she jitters and jives