Text

what if
i'm in a sea
of white lilies
their secret
scent a burial
shroud
mouth to mouth
with a razor
blade
lick her up
and down
until the blood
runs down
my chin
poor wounded
tongue seeking
refuge
in my cold
mouth

icy hands holding
white lilies
soft and smooth
shaven skin
moist
the spaces between
my fingers look
funny in the
dim light
each finger a separate
kingdom
red angry scrapes
on the back of one
too many
days spent scratching
at the back of the
throat
searching for purchase

don't look up
the sky is falling
light shining through
me
shoulderblades
sharp and cutting
moth drawn to
a flickering flame
the wings catching
alight
black still body lying
on the ground

the drifts of white
lilies at my feet
i could drown in
them feel their snowy
bodies encase me
until all i can
see is white
white instead of
red

laugh until the
blood escapes
my mouth
tired eyes unfocused
i'm not worth dying
for
hold my hands up in
the classic position
and pretend i
were only so grand

waxen skin in
the light of the sun
too many days
spend hiding in
the closet
waiting for life
to leave
hold my grasping
hands together
and pretend they
don't tremble

concaved stomach
and hair long
and oh so very
thin
good good good
if you want
to be thin
secret whispers
deny yourself
there is no
hunger and
there is no body

slowly and deliberately
smooth
my hands over
the hollows my
body feel the emptiness
take sustenance
lips blue with silent
want
dumb eyes red
after too many days
purging until
there is blood

silently wait
for the rusty scent
of blood and
lie down in my
bed and wait
for the dark

the white lilies will
carry me off
to sleep